Thursday, November 19, 2009

Ramblings

* Just to get this out of the way...the CBC Mustangs are now 5-0! I'm so glad they won Tuesday night - not just because I like to win - but because they drove 8 hours to get there, I had to spend a weeknight by myself, and again, everyone on the team scored! Long trips are hard on everyone involved, so at least you feel like it's worth it with a win.

* Tuesday night, I had only my 2nd or 3rd out-of-the-blue pregnancy emotional meltdown. I was sad, I wasn't scared - the tears just came. I left work and got in "big red," my Pop's truck that I'm driving until I get a new vehicle. I guess the smell of the truck (he was a smoker,) the time of the year, and overall insano hormones combined and I just started crying. I cried all the way to El Acapulco (because nachos mexicanos is always the answer for tears - happy or sad ones,) I was also doing the semi praying out loud/talking to myself thing...Glad it was dark because I looked CRAZY. I even started laughing at myself at one point.

So, I get to El Acapulco, dry the tears, get my food, get back in "big red," and Steven Curtis Chapman's new song comes on the radio. Seriously - I couldn't control myself - the song is called "Heaven is the Face." If you're not familiar with the story of his daughter's death, google it or go to http://www.stevencurtischapman.com/. The lyrics are so honest, so sad, yet so beautiful.

I had only heard the song once before this night, but what stood out to me was his description of heaven in the bridge of the song:

But in my mind's eye I can see a place
Where your glory fills every empty space.
All the cancer is gone,
Every mouth is fed,
and there's no one left in the orphan's bed.
Every lonely heart finds their one true love,
And there's no more goodbye,
And no more not enough,
And there's no more enemy.

Amen! That kind of just pumps me up!

I was originally trying to come up with a Thanksgiving post, you know "I'm thankful for..." but I couldn't do it. It would be way too long, too sappy, I would feel guilty later for leaving someone out unintentionally. But, in this season, I am so thankful for heaven and all the aspects of grace, redemption, love, promise, and joy that it brings mind. Both my Pop and Papa are there, along with many other loved ones - of course we miss these loved ones, but oh my how I rejoice knowing where they are. All because of the salvation they were offered and accepted through Christ during their life on this earth.

Ok, I'm crying, I'll move on.

* I go to the doctor this afternoon! I'm wearing a dress today, only because it was the lightest thing I could think of to wear as I have to be weighed after lunch! Last month I had gained 7 pounds --- exuse me? Yes, 7. I had gained a total of 3 up until that point so 7 was extreme! I really was not alarmed. I know I'm going to gain weight, I love to eat and I'm growing a human inside me, so I totally embrace the pounds. HOWEVER - I need to put myself in a good position to be able to get back to normal after this human is out of me.

I have been on the treadmill this month, probably averaging 3 or 4 days a week, for an average of 20 minutes each session. My treadmill has an incline up to 10, so I make up new workouts each time, adjusting speed and incline, so that I don't get bored and quit. It's nice to workout just to make yourself feel better and be heathly - not for specific outcomes like bathing suit season.

*I'll end the ramblings here. I'll have a doctor's report in the next post (and maybe even the revealing of the name!) Have a great rest of the week!

3 comments:

Becky said...

OH that song had tears rolling down my face yesterday in the car (is that safe?) I have always loved SCC- he's writes the sweetest, most thought-out christian lyrics I know. (So many of my friends think he's cheesy and old, but they don't sway me!) Anyway- good luck with the dr's appt! I had a rough last weigh-in too, so the dress thing made me laugh. Good idea!

The Bells said...

Name, name, name! Can't wait to hear it!

I told myself I was gonna stop looking at the scales when I was preggo....but I peeked every time!

Hope your appointment went well.

' said...

I love readying your blog and this morning I found myself crying like a little girl. I have missed my daddy so much this week; just wanting to talk to him and ask his opinion on some things. You have reminded me so sweetly that I will walk and talk with him again and it will great. Love you, sweetie.