Yesterday's Appointment

Had my weekly check-up. I am at a 1, so quite a ways to go, but that could be this weekend or in 3 weeks...who knows!! I had gained 1 pound (total of 29 so far...yikes!) and blood pressure was 100/70. Langley's heart beat was "perfect" according to Dr. Martin. I go back next Thursday - hoping for a "2" or more.

We finally have a carseat in the car. Does that mean I'm one step more prepared?!

Being very pregnant, I've gotten used to people staring and asking questions. I mean it's like there are no strangers when you get passed 8 months pregnant. When I walk into a restaraunt or a store, people stare at me like they've seen a ghost. Generally this staring is accompianied by a quick smile or whispers amongst themselves, but sometimes they just stare - hard. Depending on the time of day and where we are at, I normally don't react. I just pretend like I don't see a group of 5 adults turn their entire bodies around to look at me. I did get irritated (ok, mad) one night at our favorite Mexican restaraunt; blame it on low blood sugar and a mild case of social anxiety :-)

But, my favorite question is "Are you ready?" I normally just respond politely, "ready or not," "I think so," "we're excited." But ya'll - really- here is the real answer:

Crap No! I have gone 27.5 years without ever having a child. I am also a realist - I will never be prepared! I don't have a clue what's about to hit me! Josh and I have both been around babies and cared for them, but that has been several years. We like kids, but are not those people that want to hold every baby in sight. Josh has never held a baby that can't hold it's own head up, it "freaks him out." Physically, I am not yet miserable all the time. There are moments - and I do dream of the day I can sleep on my stomach - but not a "I'm so miserable, get this child out of me" feeling yet.

All that being said, we are excited! I have read 5 books, parenting magazines, taken classes, done some online reading, talked to other first-timers, and PRAYED just to be a prepared as I can be. Again, I am not prepared, but I'm not totally in the dark either. We are excited to see her, meet her, touch her, and start on this c-r-a-z-y journey of being a family of 3.
That's the real answer.