We closed on our house yesterday. The signing of those papers marked the end of a 2 year trial that was the longest, most difficult hardship I've faced.
We couldn't sell the house. We didn't want to make a dime, just get rid of the financial burden. When we bought the house we had 2 jobs and no kids. We moved so that we could live on 1 job (and eventually 2 kids.) God provided this job for josh and the opportunity for me to stay home, but darkness creeps in after the savings account is gone and you've taken out loans and another credit card JUST TO BUY GROCERIES AND PAY BILLS.
We knew that the move here and the job would allow me to stay home, but we were also very aware that the budget would be tight. We knew after we sold our house, things would get better. We could even start saving some money. 2 years later. Things are hard. We have been humbled, very humbled.
It has felt like we were forgotten, taken advantage of, and/or not in God's will. Why would He let it get this bad if we were where we are supposed to be?
God is so faithful. He provided. He sustained us. When we were so desperate for help, He kept us going.
That trial is over. I learned so much. I don't want to forget or stray from the lessons God has taught me or the work He has done in me. I want to remember to be desperate for Him, to surrender every worry, to trust, to live in the light of His love instead of in the dark dread of this world.
Our lives are simpler, with fewer possessions and an awareness of what true hope and joy is. Praise Him.
Thank you Lord that we are in a new stage of life. I am breathing easier knowing that I don't have to scrape together a mortgage payment again or worry about how I'll feed my kids if someone has to go to the doctor.